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Catching the Fallout


Oh my gosh.  I feel like everyone I encountered today is dealing with heavy hearts and trying their best to move forward in life.

Life can really hit you hard sometimes,but today I feel like it hit me like a truck!

Literally EVERYONE I interacted with had some heavy news to share and I have never hugged more people and cried more in one day for so many reasons.

Today was a reminder that we don’t always have control.

We’d like to think we do, but we don’t.

There are times in life when reality hits you square in the eyes.  As I thought over each situation that I heard about today, I put myself in the shoes of the people talking.  I heard their words and I felt their pain and even shed their tears.

It humbled me.

Today I was privy to information that was close to the hearts of my friends.  I don’t know how I walked in to so many people needing to share, but I’m so thankful I was there for a hug or an ear.

The truth is, none of us will get out of here alive.  It’s the journey we take that makes life richer.  How we get through these tough times.  And what I was again reminded of today is that we need each other!

I’m dealing with teens and we have had some struggles recently.  As a result, I have opened up to other parents and even other teens to pick their brains about how to move forward in my situation.  What I have realized from the teen issues to the adult issues is that there are so many times we feel alone.  Like we are the only ones treading the roads we are on.  But in all honesty, we are all ONE.

Pain is PAIN.  It HURTS.  It leaves us EMPTY.  It leaves us QUESTIONING.  It leaves us HOPING.

Pain is an internal struggle of how to get from point A to point B, hopefully being better off from where we came.  But sometimes that isn’t the case.

Pain is EMPTY.  Pain is HOLLOW.  Pain is SCARY….. Pain is …..UNCERTAINTY…..

It doesn’t matter the kind of pain you feel.  The goal is the same across the board…. HOW DO I GET RID OF THE PAIN???

As I have struggled this week with my own issues, I’m made aware that there is much perspective to be had as I talk to all my friends going through HELL.  My pain is bad, but it’s not the worst in the lot.  But regardless of the type of pain we have the fact is NO ONE wants to be where we are.

You can measure it, but why?  There is nothing to be gained by stating what level of hurt you are at when the sheer goal is to get to the other side.

I once heard a story and it’s screaming to be told….  It was about anger, but you will get my point if you replace it with pain…..

There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the back of the fence.

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks, as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there.”

Pain will leave it’s mark.  And it has to be dealt with.  It doesn’t go away on its own…and it totally SUCKS……Only sometimes…… it serves to build us up.

We have a choice in how we deal.  We can let it consume us, and try to “COPE” with our pain in various negative ways…. or we can realize that in some cases (not all) that we need to learn to grow stronger because of it.

The bare and sad truth is, “We DON’T have control”.  But we can’t let pain control us.  If we let it control us, it can be debilitating.  If we take a step back and examine what it’s doing to us, we can start to learn and grow.  That said, Pain IS a grieving process and can take time. Don’t rush it, but don’t let it eat you alive….

Life is a constant journey of peaks and valleys.  If you always stand on the peaks of life, you can never appreciate what you have.  It’s when we fight our way back from the bottom, that the peaks are richer and fill our souls deeper!

I’m blessed to have friends that trust me.  I’m thankful that I could hug and support.  My heart hurts for you and my soul will send out every positive vibe and deepest prayer it can reach.

We need each other.  Don’t EVER be ashamed that you need support.  Like I said before, we aren’t getting out alive.  Isn’t the journey just a bit better when you share it with those you love?